Bz 2 – Head Trauma 4

PB2

 

Today’s recap is brought to you live from Quiet Room #3 at the Advanced Neurokinetics Traumatology and Concussion Clinic in Vancouver, British Columbia. As always I am your host, Mr. Zilla, and I would like to thank our listeners on BeeZee1040 and all our digital print subscribers online at bladezillas.info for joining us today for the first in a special 16 part interview with Sean Ruczko and Joleen Badger.

 

Bladezillas 2 – Mad Ferrets 4

 

Mr. Zilla: Good evening Sean, Joleen, and thank you for taking time for us this evening. I know post-games are very busy and you have both sustained minor concussions this week so this must be a very difficult time for both of you.

Sean: Thank you, Mr. Zilla. Yes, I can admit the concussion was a setback this week, and I will be honest – I am hurting. What hurts more, however, is tonight’s loss. I thought we played a good game but, you know, it wasn’t enough in the end.

Joleen: Where am I? Who are you people?

Mr. Zilla: Yes, thank you, Joleen, why don’t we delve deeper into this week’s injuries. How did the concussions happen? This is your first, isn’t it, Sean?

Sean: It is, yes. It happened last week, behind the net. I went in fast, pursuing a Stonecutter, and my legs went out from under me. I went hard, into the ice, and there we are.

Mr. Zilla: Were you angry at the Stonecutter?

Sean: I wanted to be, but just before I got to my feet and started swinging I thought to myself, “How can I stay mad at screen legend and comedic genius Carey Elwes?” So we hugged it out.

Mr. Zilla: Uh, ok. That.. seems plausible. And you, Joleen? How did you get your concussions? This isn’t your first, I understand.

Joleen: Pucks hit my head. Pucks make my memories soft. I can count to 5! Do you want to see! One! Two! Three…

Sean: It was a much closer game then the score would have you believe. We went down a goal in the first, sure, but we had some great chances and we were always out-shooting them. Dan had a great goal to tie it up but then, what can you do? Just as we are getting some momentum: boom. Vizinni argues his way out of the tie. Stonecutters go up another goal. It was inconceivable!

Joleen: Where am I? Why, yes, Sean, I would like some peanuts.

Mr. Zilla: I am getting confused. Didn’t Jaime Wright get another tying goal in the second? That had to keep hope alive, I Imagine.

Sean: It really did. He works so hard, Jaime does. He really thought [Stonecutter’s Goalie] Colin Lo was the guy, you know? He just kept going at him and digging. [Colin] could be hiding any number of fingers in that big glove. It was too bad, we all really hope Jaime find the man who killed his father.

Mr. Zilla: Are you alright? Sean, I am over here. Hi, Sean. Isn’t that.. the plot to the Princess Bride?

Joleen: I want to be a Princess. Can I be a princess? I would be a really good princess. Promise!

Sean: I thought we had them in the final act. We were behind – I admit that. We were poisoned, and things looked grim, but we were saved. True love! That’s all we ever needed. With True Love we could overcome any obstacle!

Joleen: This isn’t my home. I want my home! Is this my home?

Mr. Zilla: This is definitely the plot to 1987’s “The Princess Bride,” Sean, and True Love didn’t save the day. You lost, by 2 goals. The last goal was into an empty net. Are you sure you are both Okay? The Doctor said to keep the interview short but…

Joleen: My favorite shorts have hearts on them!

Sean: I am just so, so honored. I want to thank the academy, of course, and my agent. And I cant forget Cary and Mandy and Dewey and Rob. I never dreamed… I had a speech but…

Mr Zilla: And that is all the time we have for tonight. I would like to thank our guests Sean and Joleen for speaking with us tonight and wish them both a speedy recovery. Good night, everyone. Doctor! Hello, Nurse? Can we get some help to Quiet Room #3? And a mop? And some disinfectant… We are going to need some new heart-covered pants, I think…